Although starting this blog is not what I mean by the title, ‘ A New Adventure’, it is kind of a new adventure considering I’ve never blogged before – unless you count tumblr as ‘blogging’ and then I’ve been ‘blogging’ images and relevant text posts for quite a while – E.G
ME: *SEES MY STUFFED ANIMAL ON THE FLOOR NEXT TO MY BED*
ME: WHY WASN’T I A BETTER PARENT (x)
My new adventure is named below (and in the title as a last minute edit – damn) and I hope you enjoy a little (or ‘lottle’) insight into my worries / thoughts surrounding the whole thing.
My real adventure, or what I hope will be my real adventure, will be starting University in September this year. (2015) Although I haven’t properly started looking forward to Uni yet, because I haven’t gotten my results (August please be good to me), I still think about it everyday and what it will be like. And this thinking doesn’t even just happen when my Grandad comes round for a cup of tea every Sunday, these thoughts come to me when I’m on the toilet and they come in the form of ‘damn, I’m gonna miss having a clean bathroom.’
So I guess university is a huge thing for a lot of people. Luckily (for them and me), quite a few people in my family have been to university and I guess that’s a reassuring thing – knowing I’ll have lots of people who know what it feels like – but they’re all… kind of, a lot older now. And yeah, it’s still reassuring but at the same time, they’re not 18 anymore, ‘dealing’ with the same stuff 18 year old’s deal with, like whether to get up at 12pm or 4pm, or whether to go downstairs and make tea or wait for somebody else to offer – something I’m thinking I won’t have the luxury of at university.
The things I’m most worried about, of all the things that come along with uni, are not making friends, getting lonely and missing my family too much. But I guess all of these things come under the same umbrella term – change. I HATE change. I like to stay in my comfortable little bubble where I know what’s going on and who’s around me, not be launched into a totally new environment/experience with people I have no idea about and an experience I’m 100% new to.
I guess, some people would say that change is a good thing, and admittedly, when I went to college I felt ridiculously apprehensive but actually made good friends – but had a rubbish time because A-Levels are pooey – who I will really miss seeing on a daily basis. But I think university is a bit higher up on the ‘change’ scale – which exists now, apparently.
University involves moving away from your home, your friends and pretty much everything you’ve probably been used to for a relatively long time. People’s situations are obviously different and for some people this might be a god send, but for me, It’s pretty damn terrifying.
As I said before, one of my main worries is not making friends and becoming lonely, and as I am probably going to live out, not making friends and being lonely is probably one of the worst things that could happen. Even though loads of people have told me that I shouldn’t worry and that everyone makes friends, googling the issue hasn’t exactly supported those claims and I can’t help but feel that they don’t quite understand. But then again, does anyone understand when you’re 18? (Okay, maybe I sound like I’m 13 with all this ‘no one understands me stuff’ but really, do they?)
Another thing I’m scared about that I forgot to mention, was the debt I’ll be in after finishing uni (Admittedly, I should slow down, I’m not even in yet!). £9,000 alone is a lot of money for someone who’s never really been exposed to huge amounts of cash, but times that by 3 and I’m a little short of having a nervous breakdown. Not only that, but maintenance loans (which #budget2015 will increase #thanksobama #Toryprobs) will sell me a little short when I start to earn over £21,000. So I guess the whole debt thing is rather scary and part of me feels that I’m already wallowing in it, despite not even having gone to uni yet. I guess, though, if all goes well throughout/at the end of my 3 years, the £27,000+ won’t have been wasted. But that still doesn’t make me feel any better, is it right to be in that much debt at 21 years old? Begs the question as to whether people are put off university by the cost, and I’d say, quite a few people are.
So that’s that and those are my worries for starting university. I do feel a little better for getting them all out to hopefully people who’ll understand a little more, yet I’m still apprehensive. Part of me wishes results day could just hurry up so I could know and start either getting excited/doing whatever I have to do to get a place at any uni! (#2 August please be good to me!)
And does anyone else feel a little worse now A-Levels are over? Now, we’re totally not in control of our results, like we can’t cram in any more revision to ace a particular exam because another went badly, we just have to deal with it and wait?! I thought I’d be glad when they ended – which I am because no more revision and #16 of doing absolutely nothing – but I think I’m actually feeling worse!
Anyway, that’s all and I hope some people might gain some comfort from this if reading and also stressing! If anyone has any advice then feel free to help me out because I would definitely appreciate it:) Also if anyone did like it or read it then if you could give it a like or reblog I’d be so grateful!
Rosie (awkward moment when I realise I never introduced myself)